So I learn about trauma, then racism, I learn about how access to services, healthcare, education is the thing that determines health. The social determinants of health. I learn that access is EVERYTHING, how we are treated, respected is EVERYTHING and now I find myself going for a job 13 miles down the road to do the thing that I was doing here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’ve been invited to interview. Will my age, where I come from be held against me? Time will tell. If it is it’ll be because I have a chip on my shoulder, and why wouldn’t I given how I’ve been dismissed and ignored. Remember that “Oh well”?
Sometimes there aren’t the words. I check the job description, it’s what I sought to do here (Clacton / Jaywick people) with clients (wrong word but I’m angry and frustrated, something I’ll be tone policed for) my knowledge and learning is invisible because whiteness chooses to not see it. Actively chooses to ignore it.
Good job I’ve got that experience of the social determinants of health and how this directly effects patients! I wonder if I am the only person to see the irony.
The essential criteria is the willingness to go the extra mile. I wonder if the time endangering my registration will count? I wonder if the advice to volunteer because opportunities quickly follow will be remembered?
Will the racist expectation to work for free be remembered? Will those housed and helped be remembered, will the empathy for the disadvantaged and socially isolated be extended to include people who come from here? Will the calls to safe guarding be remembered? Will the prevention of cockooing be remembered, Will the generalist clinical knowledge that was shared be remembered? Will the going the extra mile be remembered? Will the fight to get mental health support be remembered? Will the team working and collaboration be remembered? Will the problem solving and leading be remembered? Will the triaging and prioritising be remembered? The referrals to palliative care? The participation in ECHO?
Anyway, it’s raining, I’m off for a walk
Wish me luck for the interview? The whistleblowing helpline is 0800 74725 for anyone who might need it.
I’m excited for the job (trying not to build my hopes so I’m not disappointed if I don’t get it) but it doesn’t come without irony and saying what I experienced to get me here and a sadness that the service wasn’t important here. As I write that. I wonder if that’s gaslighting but then reading the job description has been gaslighting. Is that how it works negative experience fuelling the next experience? All I tried to get was an Inclusion Health Nurse (Homelessness and Rough Sleeping) for here. I wonder how the role would have evolved with support, what links to research, what links to service development, what meaningful support for those who could be included.